James and I first heard the words, “Love is a decision” from a Catholic priest about five years after we were married. It was a bit of a paradigm shift. Even in the pre-marriage class we attended, we could not remember hearing that concept. However, after only five years of marriage, we both knew the truth of those words.
In the early years of our married life, we still relied on good “old-fashioned love”. We figured that is what would sustain us through inevitable hard times. And good times, too. Our immature hearts would trump our rational brains into believing that love is a feeling, always there, always reliable. But by the time we heard those words, like most married couples, the honeymoon was over, and the reality of three children, a mortgage, and the everyday stresses of life had taken its place. At this point the decision to love seemed like an idea worth exploring. [Read more…]